This scripture has been on my mind today:
"She extends her hands to the poor. Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy." Proverbs 31:20
Many times a day, our sweet foster son walks toward me, arms outstretched, needing to be held. I pick him up, hold him and usually let him decide when he is ready to be put down. There are times when I need to put him down before he is ready, so I'll say, "I'm going to put you down now, but I'll be right here." Sometimes he toddles off and plays and sometimes he'll just sit down and cry. If he cries, I usually pick him up or Gramm will pick him up and bring him to me. This little guy needs lots of love and he needs me to be his Mommy....but not forever.
Nothing could have prepared me for bonding with a child and knowing all the while that he is not mine, he will not ever be mine and that someday, he will leave our home. J and I both thought we were aware of all that we signed up for in becoming foster parents. In theory, it's so noble and yadayadayada, but in reality, it's just a little crazy. Foster care does not make sense, but it's what we feel lead to do and we'll keep doing it. God has given us the grace for each second and I know His grace will not run out with me and my needy self.
Please pray for our family as we venture down this new road. We rely on and rest in the sovereignty of God each step of the way. Love to all.